I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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