You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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