apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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