There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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