You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
