yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Randomize
