idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
