Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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