it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
