OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
