He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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