I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Randomize
