I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize