He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i may or may not be watching the land before time
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I need to sanitize my soul.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
