Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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