i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
