Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
