i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
if only i could text you this smell
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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