nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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