Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
