Small penises have feelings too.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
