I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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