Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
