hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
