I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
