don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
