whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Randomize
