She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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