so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
