hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Randomize
