I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
