god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
