is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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