We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
