He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
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