is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
