"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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