It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
