Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
