Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
