i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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