I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Randomize
