three words: i give head
three words: not that well
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
