sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
