just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize