I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize