Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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