Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
