I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
