I can't breathe out the right side of my face
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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